Space Subway
by custardpringle
Summary: Never use public transportation with signage you can't read. R&R please


TITLE: Space Subway AUTHOR: Cyn(di) EMAIL: custardpringle@yahoo.com RATING: PG-13 (Mild language, violence) CATEGORY: Action/adventure, drama, mild humor SUMMARY: Never use public transportation with signage you can't read. SPOILERS: None, as far as I know. AUTHOR'S NOTE: Finally, I found a way to combine two of my biggest interests: British history and "Stargate." Again, feedback is nice. Thanks go out to Russel A. Herner for his book on Stonehenge, which told me more than I ever needed to know about Freemasonry but also had some useful diagrams. Also thanks ever so much to spacemonkey766 for betaing. Maybe she'll submit some of her own some day (hint, hint).  
  
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Routine mission? Yeah, right.  
  
Colonel O'Neill knew that, for his team at least, there was no such thing as a "routine" mission. Distinctively nonroutine things tended to happen. This one, however, seemed like it might turn out to be fun-- for Daniel and Sam, anyway. Come to think of it, the place looked ripe for ambush, so maybe he and Teal'c wouldn't be totally bored.  
  
O'Neill turned and grinned at the rest of his team as they emerged from the Gate. "Look, Daniel. Lots of rocks to keep you busy."  
  
The archaeologist heaved a weary sigh. "They're arti--" He broke off and gaped as he saw what Jack had been referring to. Carter was momentarily stunned into silence as well. Even Teal'c appeared impressed.  
  
About a quarter-mile away stood a gigantic circle of upright stone pillars, with flat horizontal stones connecting them at the top. Inside this circle was a horseshoe formation of five even taller pairs of pillars, each pair also topped by a horizontal stone. The whole arrangement was about thirty feet high.  
  
"Wow," breathed Sam at last. "I bet this is some sort of astronomical observatory, like Stonehenge."  
  
"That must've what Stonehenge looked like when it was first built," Daniel added. "I'd like to take a closer look at this."  
  
Jack, who had been scanning the surroundings, nodded. "All right, kids, let's check it out. There doesn't seem to be anything dangerous around right now." The two scientists were off like a shot.  
  
Teal'c and O'Neill followed behind, the colonel explaining Stonehenge to his bemused friend as they went. "Apparently, it was built by aliens as well," he concluded. "Guess that's another point for the flying saucer nuts."  
  
Up ahead, Daniel called back, "I heard that!"  
  
Jack heaved a sigh of his own. This was probably going to be a routine mission after all. Which meant it would be boring as hell.  
  
What was worse-- being bored or being shot at? He wasn't sure.  
  
-----  
  
Within a few minutes, the team had regrouped just outside the monument. Teal'c squinted against the sun, trying to see inside, and finally announced, "There appears to be no one else inside." Thus reassured, they entered in single file.  
  
Daniel immediately examined the nearest pillar, which, along with all the others, had a short inscription at abour eye level. "I don't recognize this writing," he reported, "but it looks similar to Ogham. I'd need to go back to my office and get some books if I'm going to translate it."  
  
Jack, who had already decided that being bored was worse, looked up hopefully at the prospect of leaving and promptly tripped over a large flat stone in the center of the inner horseshoe. He landed neatly, if somewhat forcefully, an a seated position. "Shit!"  
  
None of them heard the faint click the stone made as it shifted slightly deeper into the ground.  
  
Trying to hide a grin, Sam offered him a hand, but he waved her away. "Nah, I'm comfortable here for now." He paused and cocked an ear. "What's that noise?"  
  
An odd hum was coming from the stone he had tripped over. It grew steadily louder, to an almost earsplitting whine-- then stopped abruptly. The view through the archway in front of Daniel flickered and suddenly appeared to lead somewhere else entirely. He jumped back in alarm. The same thing happened in several other places. Sam reached out tentatively to the nearest, a bleak snowscape, and her hand passed through the arch easily, and went almost instantly numb from the cold. She snatched it back hastily.  
  
"This technology is far more advanced than anything I have ever seen," observed Teal'c. "It appears to be a sophisticated form of transportation."  
  
"It could be an incredibly realistic simulation," Daniel pointed out. "But why imitate a place if you can just go there?" He was still warily eyeing the jungle facing him. A small lizard wandered out, returned the look, and quickly scuttled back to its home world.  
  
Carter nodded. "Definitely transportaion. That lizard was no simulation."  
  
"Yeah," muttered Jack, who was still seated on the ground. "Whatever." Then some new hope came into his eyes. "So . . . we could go and check some of these places out?"  
  
"That might not be--"  
  
"For crying out loud, Daniel, you don't have to come. Neither do you, Carter, so wipe that look off your face. Anyway, you two can work a hell of a lot better without me getting in your way."  
  
The scientists shared a look that spoke volumes about the unfortunate consequences of having one's lab invaded by Colonel Jack O'Neill, and both nodded assent.  
  
Teal'c still wasn't sure. "O'Neill, we know nothing about any of these places. At least some of them are certainly controlled by Goa'ould."  
  
"Don't worry, you're coming along to keep me out of trouble. What happened to your sense of adventure?" Before the Jaffa could reply, the colonel stood up and indicated an archway at random. "Let's try that one." The scene didn't look too different from the world they were currently on, except that it was nighttime. "If there are patrols, they might miss us in the dark."  
  
Teal'c rolled his eyes slightly, but didn't hesitate to follow his commander, although he thoughtfully picked up a few weapons along the way. The pair stepped cautiously through the massive portal as their two friends watched anxiously.  
  
Half a minute later, several voices called out to each other in Goa'ould, and staff shots flared out of the darkness. One actually came through the arch, and Sam ducked just in time. Moments later, just as Jack and Teal'c cam in to view running back, another passed just over the opening, whch immediately flickered back to showing the sunny field outside the megaliths.  
  
Sam bit her lip. "The arch on their end must have been damaged."  
  
"And they could be damn well anywhere in the galaxy," Jackson said gloomily. "I told him this wasn't a good idea."  
  
-----  
  
"I did tell you that this was not a good idea," Teal'c pointed out. Jack stopped pacing their cell and glared at him.  
  
"Yes, Teal'c. You did. And a fat lot of help it is to us now." He punched the stone wall in frustration, yelped, and redirected his glare at a set of freshly skinned knuckles. "Dammit, can't I do anything right today?"  
  
"I have great faith in you, O'Neill."  
  
"Thanks. Do you also have any ideas about getting out of here? Because I seriously doubt anyone else will be able to find us."  
  
"Indeed I do not. However--" Tealc continued swiftly, cutting off any retort the colonel might have-- "I believe it might be wise to wait until we are retrieved by the Jaffa. It may then be possible to escape, or to learn something conducive to escape."  
  
Jack sat down and leaned against the wall, still nursing his injured hand. "And what if they just decide to execute us?"  
  
"That is unlikely. From the conversation I overheard as they brought us here, I would surmise that they believe us to be spies." Teal'c inclined his head gravely. "We will most likely be tortured for information rather than killed immediately."  
  
"Guess torture is better than execution," Jack said doubtfully. "Think they'll feed us? Maybe we can get out then."  
  
"That too is unlikely."  
  
"I knew I could count on you for some optimism, Teal'c." O'Neill closed his eyes. "I'll take a nap while I'm waiting." He fell asleep almost instantly.  
  
Teal'c remained seated, motionless, contemplating the closed door of the cell.  
  
-----  
  
"Holy shit!" Sam slapped her forehead. "How could I have been so stupid?"  
  
Looking up from the assorted books and papers spread around him, Danel took a gulp from the second of several coffee thermoses General Hammond had thoughtfully sent along. "What?"  
  
"You don't need to translate all those labels after all. You have a copy of the one from the arch Teal'c and Colonel O'Neill went through, right?"  
  
"Of course. Why?"  
  
"Well, if we took that copy through another functioning arch--"  
  
Comprehension dawned in the archaeologist's eyes. "We could match it to one in another circle!"  
  
"And we would be able to follow them that way and help them out."  
  
Daniel grinned. "Too simple for us paranoiacs." Then his face fell a little. "How are we going to find them once we get there?"  
  
"Shouldn't be too hard." Sam spoke confidently. "If Jaffa were patrolling there, that circle must be near something important. Teal'c and the colonel are probably imprisoned there."  
  
"Assuming," Daniel observed bleakly, "they're still alive."  
  
"Don't worry. You know those two; they take a lot of killing." Carter hoped she sounded more sure of herself than she really was, now that Daniel had brought up the issue.  
  
"All right." Her teammate stood up, stepped gingerly over his work, and joined her inside he circle of stones. they retrieved their vests and shrugged into them, Jackson tucking his notebook with the necessary information into a vacant pocket.  
  
"Okay," said Sam grimly. "Let's go."  
  
-----  
  
They stepped through into the middle of a desert. Daniel kicked the flat central stone, and several sections of the circle flickered to life. He soon located one with an inscription matching that in his pocket-- but it wasn't working. "Sam," he called out, "this one's broken too."  
  
So they went back, and tried another arch.  
  
And another.  
  
And another.  
  
After the sixth attempt, Carter finally concluded, "This is hopeless. You might as well go back to your translation."  
  
Daniel looked at her in bewilderment. "You're giving up?"  
  
"No. I just think it's not likely that the arches we're trying to get through all just happen to be damaged, unless the monument on the planet Teal'c and Colonel O'Neill went to is in a lot worse shape than we thought."  
  
"So, what else could it be?"  
  
"I think these structures might be designed all on a single circuit, or something like that. If one arch is damaged, the whole circle shuts down," Sam said disappointedly. "I knew this was too simple."  
  
"Like a string of Christmas lights," the archaeologist commented. "At least now we know why nothing like this has been reported before. All the megalithic circled on Earth wre wrecked by invading armies."  
  
"A good idea, but badly designed," Carter observed ruefully. "We'd better get back to doing this the slow way."  
  
-----  
  
Sometime during Daniel's third thermos, O'Neill was jerked rudely from his nap, and Teal'c from his meditation, by the grinding of gears as their cell door slid open. Both men jumped instantly to their feet.  
  
Teal'c scanned the entering guards. "They appear to be servants of Bastet. We have had few dealings with her in the past; perhaps she will be lenient."  
  
"Silence!" thundered the lead Jaffa, who was flanked by another guard on each side. "The goddess Bastet has passed judgement on you both. You have been declared to be spies and heretics. As such, you will be executed in one hour's time. The goddess has willed it so."  
  
"Now wait just a minute," Jack objected. "We're not spies, for crying out loud. We don't even know where the hell we are." The guard nodded to one of his subordinates, who immediately leveled his staff at the colonel. Jack continued heedlessly. "If this is how you treat poor lost travellers, I'd sure hate to actually be a criminal."  
  
A beam of energy shot from the soldier's weapon. O'Neill's commentary abruptly turned into screams of pain, and he fell to the floor as bright orange poured from his eyes and mouth.  
  
Teal'c continued to look steadily at the guards, his anger betrayed only by a slight tremble in his voice. "How can you do this?" he asked, his eyes boring into those of the other Jaffa. "How can you continue to kill and torture innocent people in the name of a false god?"  
  
Another nod, and Teal'c was writhing on the floor next to his friend. At last the guard motioned his two henchmen out of the room. He himself, however, paused a moment before leaving. "You should be happy," he reproached the prisoners. "Honored that the goddess herself wishes to witness your executions, and grateful for an hour's respite before she arrives here."  
  
With that, the soldier swepr out of the cell, trying to forget the intensity with which Teal'c had spoken. The Sho'vah had seemed so sure. Could it be . . . No. He must not have such thoughts. The goddess would be angry.  
  
As the door slammed shut, O'Neill rolled over and stifled another yell; the agony of the staff was still fading, and his arm was definitely broken where he had fallen on it. Still, he managed to lift his head slightly and gasp, "Lenient?"  
  
Teal'c wisely said nothing.  
  
-----  
  
By the time the guard left the cell, Daniel was well into his fourth thermos. He was making good progress with the translation-- but so far it had been a waste of time. It wasn't telling him anything he needed to know. Sure, he knew the name of the planet-- Narnus-- along with the name of every other planet this circle could still get them to. And Sam had fed every one into the database on her laptop-- and come up with nothing.  
  
Carter, who had been pacing restlessly, came up behind him. "How's it coming?"  
  
Daniel jumped, scattering the papers in his lap. "Dammit, Sam, don't do that!" He ran his fingers through his hair so that it stood on end, making him look half-crazed-- which was not far from the truth, considering his current levels of frustration and caffeine. "To be honest, I don't know. Whoever built these things, if they weren't the Ancients, they ust have been aware of them at least. There's got to be something somewhere that'll give us the Stargate address for these planets."  
  
"Those ten larger stones in the center?"  
  
The archaeologist nodded. "Yeah, that's what I'm working on, but it'll take a while. You see, these things work something like a subway. Each one doesn't go to all the others. A traveller might have to go through several-- "  
  
"We don't have time, Daniel." Boredom and worry were wearing Sam's patience thin. "Get to the point."  
  
"Well, there are only thirty arches here--" Daniel vaguely gestured at the stones around them-- "But the whole system encompasses three thousand worlds."  
  
"Three thousand?"  
  
"Yup," Jackson confirmed. And they're all listed here. It might take some time to find the one we're looking for."  
  
The major groaned. "I don't suppose there's anything I could do to help out?"  
  
"No, sorry." Daniel grinned wryly. "You'll have plenty to do pretty soon. I promise."  
  
He stood up and began running a finger down the list of names on the first pillar, muttering to himself as he went. Sam sat down glumly and watched.  
  
-----  
  
As Daniel was finishing his fifth thermos, Jack looked at Teal'c and asked for the twenty-third time, "How much longer?"  
  
"Indeed I do not know," Teal'c replied patiently, also for the twenty-third time. "However, I believe our hour is almost ended."  
  
-----  
  
Halfway across the galaxy, Doctor Daniel Jackson leapt to his feet, splattering coffee dregs over his papers, the grass, and the front of his shirt. "Got it!"  
  
-----  
  
"Oh, well," said Jack. "It's been good knowing you, T."  
  
"It has been an honor to serve with you as well, O'Neill."  
  
"Thanks."  
  
-----  
  
Carter came hurrying over. "You have the Stargate coordinates?"  
  
"Yeah." Daniel hurriedly regathered his equipment, and the two set off at a dead run back to the 'gate.  
  
Jackson dialed quickly, and this time it was he who took a deep breath and said, "Okay. Let's go."  
  
-----  
  
One minute after Carter and Jackson arrived on the planet where their friends were imprisoned, the door of said friends' cell slid open again. They rose slowly to their feet, knowing what was coming, knowing that this time-- finally-- there was no hope of escape or rescue. Even Jack had nothing to say for once.  
  
The guard didn't have much to say, either: only three words. "It is time."  
  
-----  
  
On a hill about a hundred yards away, Sam and Daniel saighted Bastet's palace and began to creep towards it. The fortress appeared to be lightly guarded, perhaps because it was in the middle of the woods.  
  
Carter thanked heaven something was finally going right. With luck, they might even get back to the SGC on time for once.  
  
-----  
  
The corridors inside seemed to go on forever. O'Neill didn't know whether to be glad or not; mostly he just wanted the pain in his arm to stop. There's something worse than either being bored or being shot at, he thought: being bored while waiting to be shot at. "If this doesn't end soon," he muttered to Teal'c, "they may not even need to execute me. I may keel over from sheer anticipation."  
  
-----  
  
In the next corridor over, two guards crumpled to the floor. Two pairs of blue eyes widened in alarm at the revealing clatter.  
  
-----  
  
Jack was prodded forcefully in the back, and he fell quiet. However, the silence was shortly broken by a loud crash from somewhere nearby. All three guards stopped in their tracks, forcing their two prisoners to stop as well, and looked around cautiously.  
  
In a flash of intuition, O'Neill smiled. "Teal'c," he said loudly, "I do believe the cavalry has arrived."  
  
One of the soldiers opened his mouth to reprimand the colonel, but he was cut off by a well-timed zat blast. His companions quickly went the same way. One of their staffs struck Jack's shoulder, and he gritted his teeth against fresh stabs of pain from the broken bone.  
  
Daniel ran up, with Sam close behind. "Boy, am I glad to see you're still alive. Are you both all right?"  
  
"Colonel O'Neill has a broken arm," Teal'c informed him. "I am unharmed."  
  
"'Kay . . ." Jackson hunted through his myriad pockets. "I've got a bandana here somewhere. It should serve as a sling until we get back."  
  
"We were afraid you might have been killed by now," Sam explained, relief as evident in her voice as in Daniel's.  
  
"We almost were," Jack grumped, giving the impromptu sling an experimental tug. It held. "Could you have cut this any closer?"  
  
The team began moving cautiously back down the corridor. "We came as soon as we could, sir," Carter said defensively, "seeing as you decided to use that arch before the writing was translated. We had no idea how to find you."  
  
"For crying out loud. You spent two hours reading rocks? Couldn't you have done that a bit faster? I thought you were supposed to be a boy wonder." Jack stared at Jackson incredulously.  
  
"Come to think of it, Jack . . . no. I couldn't."  
  
"Yeah, sure. Whatever. You win." The colonel considered a moment. "Hey, T. Next time I want to do something this dumb, don't even bother to argue. Just club me over the head with something to shut me up, will ya?"  
  
"Very well, O'Neill," Teal'c agreed. "But I sincerely hope I will never be forced to fulfill that promise."  
  
"So do I. But you never know."  
  
-----  
  
A few minutes later, Jack spoke up again. "Hey, Danny, do you think maybe we could have a mission go according to schedule for once?"  
  
The archaeologist smiled. "I'll see what I can do." 


End file.
